Dear Shop

Dear Shop,

I’m writing this through a haze of tears and exhaustion, so forgive me if I ramble on a little. I’ll be as clear as I can be.

Why, oh why, do you torture me so?

You’ve heard of toddlers, yes? They are fun-loving, gorgeous little scamps, but they are also stubborn, fiercely independent and have a definite leaning towards unreasonable behaviour.

So, when I need to just nip in and grab a couple of bits and bobs from you, I beg of you, don’t have one of these in your entrance….(I refer to the ride-on, not the boy, you understand)

Little Man on Thomas

Have you any idea at all how immoveable small people can become when confronted with such vehicular delights? Yes, you probably have, and so you aim to please them and tend to their every whim with these little treats. But Shop, when did you last see a toddler paying for your wares? If I’m your consumer, shouldn’t it be me that you’re aiming to please? And believe me when I say that these do not please me.

Who even uses them? I think I’ve only ever seen them actually moving around 5 times in my entire life. I cannot be the only parent advising my children that they are broken every single time they attempt to inveigle a coin from me?

Please, I’m begging you, remove them. They serve no purpose. They are not going to persuade me to enter your premises. They will only ensure a huge commotion and scuffle as I attempt to wrestle said tot off the thing, literally kicking and screaming. No-one needs that, least of all me. And no, I won’t give in and part with my £1. That is one precedent I am determined not to set.

Yours Hopefully,

Harassed Mum.

P.S. while you’re removing these ‘fun rides’ can you please refrain from putting playhouses outside your shops, too. A toddler and a playhouse can only equal an exasperated mum luring said child out – eventually – with a bourbon cream. True story.

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37 thoughts on “Dear Shop”

  1. I can definitely relate to this one! I’m a bit embarrassed to say that my husband and I lie through our teeth and say “Oh that’s not working!” Otherwise, we’d never get any shopping done!

  2. Yes yes yes, and can you please stop putting sweets by the till at toddler height, so that I endanger the security of my pin code by interrupting my transaction 50 times to wrestle creme eggs and mars bars out of my toddler’s grabby hands before she eats them wrapper and all??

    1. Jocelyn Reading

      Aah, this, too! My son grabs everything he possibly can at the till, whether he’s in or out of the pushchair. Chocolates are a nightmare!

  3. Awwwww Hun *big hugs* I do use these and I have on a regular use them to bribe my kids for good behaviour while shopping with a promise of an treat, stickers or a ride. So I actually like them but I do understand the tantrums and tears they can induce in little ones x mine had had a fair few when I have just popped in for a few bits x

    1. Jocelyn Reading

      Ah, you see that might work with my daughter, though she’s not really the problem, but my son’s too young to grasp that and he’s the tantrum one!

  4. Eurggghh! I hate hate hate these!!!!!! Now imagine going for an evening walk and you pass a million of the bloody things! (We live in Skegness, Skegness Seafront is an arcade heaven….also known as #tantrumcentral) AND they are a con, we used to get erm £1 for 3 goes so 1 go each and share the last ride…no not now..NOW they want £1 per ride a bloody £1…no thanks id rather have a screaming toddler than put £2 in your pockets! GRRRRRRRRR!!! X

    1. Jocelyn Reading

      Oh no. We visited Skegness a couple of weeks back and had a nightmare with them there, so I totally know what you’re talking about! x

  5. I totally agree. I usually let mine play for a minute on these and on the plus side, they don’t care about putting money in. On the down side, they usually scream and cry as I carry them away from it.

  6. Wow, I used to love these – they’ve never bothered me in the slightest! I used to think it was cute when my kids climbed on them and very, very occasionally they would be allowed an actual ride on them. Maybe I was lucky that my kids got off it when they were told? It’s so long ago I don’t really remember!

  7. I actually quite like them *runs for cover* as it means I’m normally able to get around the supermarket in relative peace and with full compliance if I promise R he can go and sit on it afterwards (occasionally I even put money in!). Bribery is one of things I said I’d never do with MY children before I became a parent but now I find it a very useful parenting tool 😉

    1. Jocelyn Reading

      Ah, but that won’t work with my one year old as he hasn’t quite sussed delayed gratification yet! But yes, bribery works!

  8. I just figured it out!! They must have been designed when whole families went shopping together… Yes, that has to be it!! One parent is supposed to be able to go around and shop IN PEACE!! whilst the other is supposed to entertain the kids…
    So ok shops! Wake up call… There aren’t two parents shopping!! Just one.

  9. When Lewis was a tot he loved these, I sometime gave in and let him play… now he knows I won’t put that penny in the machine and in some of them he is actually getting a tad too tall for them so he’s given up. As for Leah, she HATES them… doesn’t mind them sitting still but hates them once they start moving. #WinWin!

  10. The thing that really really winds me up though is sweets (or anything else for that matter) under tills, just at the right height for toddlers to be seduced by… how difficult is it to try and pack shopping and pay for it while attempting to prevent a child from moving the entire display around or pushing a finger through a kinda egg??? You can’t put the child behind you because you can’t see them and you can’t hold onto them because you need your hands! The people behind you start getting frustrated because your taking double the amount of time and then you forget your pin number because it’s all getting a bit too much, haha. Why can’t they put mirrors and some those cog things down there instead??? You know what else annoys me… those machines with the balls in but I won’t get ted myself started on those 😉

    1. Jocelyn Reading

      Oh yes, please don’t get me started on something else, though! It’s a nightmare navigating through tills like that, and I have one free to rummage and one in the trolley, just at the right height to grab there, too – hate it!

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